Can You Find Love Online?

Dear E. Jean: I have a Craigslist etiquette question. I met the man of my dreams—Stanford grad, modern-art collector, brilliant—on the Casual Encounters section. He was sweet and attentive, and for months I was able to indulge every erotic fantasy I could think of. But then he moved 70 miles away, and we stopped seeing each other. I recently checked Casual Encounters for his new city, and there he was, looking for a partner. I cannot tell you the pain I felt, E. Jean! I posed as someone new and busted him. He apologized, and we met again. It was incredibly hot. But now I’m at a loss for how to proceed. Shouldn’t he come right out and make me his girlfriend? Or does his actively searching for playmates mean he’s never going to be serious?—Hopeless Romantic

Advertisement – Continue Reading Below

Hopeless, Dear, Dear, Dear Girl: It means “he’s never going to be serious” with you. I’m sorry to hurt your feelings. It stings my heart that you’ve got it so bad, but Casual Encounters won’t bring you love—it will bring you sex. Get that straight, sweetheart, or men will play you for a dunce the rest of your life.

This letter is from the E. Jean archive.

Independent pharmacies and online coupons help patients save money on drugs


After finding that prices for some common antibiotics can vary by up to $100 in one metropolitan area, experts suggest that patients could save money by shopping for their drugs online or at independent pharmacies. However, few Americans actively comparison shop for health care, according to a separate study.

Why Won’t the Girl I’m Online Dating Meet Me?

Dear E. Jean: I’m a 30-year-old guy. I’m writing to you because I want honest, impartial advice on the following question: Am I an asshole?

I met a girl on a dating site, and we started to talk—and talk a lot. Over the course of the past month we probably exchanged 2,000 texts, and spoke on the phone every other day. We got along great. But she refused to meet in person, even though she’s a grad student at a university close to my office. I asked about her reluctance to meet, but she brushed it off. She said she had no “fears” and had never experienced any “horrible first dates,” so I was having difficulty understanding why we shouldn’t hang out. I therefore sent her the following message: “I need to know if you want to move this forward. It’s seriously time we either sh*t or get off the pot.”

Advertisement – Continue Reading Below

She replied that she couldn’t meet because she was “trying to quit smoking, get in shape, and look for a job.” I feel that I’ve made my intentions clear, and thus my question: Am I a total jerk? Was I right to break ties? Or should I wait and hope that one day this will turn into something more? —Can’t Understand the Female Sex

My Dear Chap: The young lady is not interested. The young lady is not looking her best. The young lady is dating another guy. The young lady is dating two other guys. The young lady is a guy.

P.S. You’re too fine a fellow to waste your affections—70 texts a day, by my calculations!—on an imaginary girlfriend. I strongly recommend you sample the excellent dating site HowAboutWe.com. You sign up and suggest a clever date you’d like to go on, as in, “How about we drink Chartreuse and guess the 130 secret ingredients?” Young ladies with the same interests accept (or suggest another cool idea). Then you simply set a time, and meet!

This letter is from the E. Jean archive.